HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY + AN E/S ONE-SHOT!!

Yes, you heard that right – after a hiatus of HOW FREAKIN’ LONG I have managed to write A Thing. I know! Shocked me, too! I’ll add it to the site proper-like later…if I remember how. WP changed w/o my permission, y’all. There has been cussin’ involved.

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An Eric and Sookie Valentine Short

A/N:  This one-shot is set in no particular time, no particular story/Universe – it’s just a one-off where there’s no Beehl, no Fellowship of the Ri…erm Sun, no Sams or Alcides or Fairies or whatever runnin’ around clouding the issue…  It’s just Eric and Sookie spending time together getting to know each other without interference.  (The way it should have been.) 

This is probably dumb but it’s my first attempt at writing in HOW MANY YEARS NOW? *bangs head – THE FLM’S HEAD – on desk* Do hope y’all enjoy it anyway.  It’s for you.

Enormous kudos go out to our lovely, patient, and absolutely amazing ○Kleannhouse○ for taking time out of her day to chisel and bang this mess into something readable.  Naturally I then had to go mucking about in it again afterwards so ALL mistakes are entirely mine.

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Someone stomped into the kitchen.

That was Sookie’s first clue.

The second clue was that they’d apparently entered via the back door instead of making an entrance via the official front door.

The third clue was a soft thump as something landed somewhere in her kitchen.

Something was up.

What the hell is he doing, she muttered to herself with a glare toward the kitchen. The timing and the lack of readable thoughts told her the kitchen-invader was a vampire.  The fact that they’d came in the back door meant they were either a regular visitor or at least felt at home there, so she wasn’t concerned about her safety…yet.

Wait a…

Eric.

She figured it had to be Eric. 

Stomping around…  Things thumping…  Bad mood, maybe?  Impatience?  Something.

He’d better not break any of gran’s crockery.

She sighed.  Here she was all wrapped up nice and warm and comfy on the sofa with a well read and reread book in her hands and an old movie playing on the possibly even older tv (the sound was down so she could concentrate on her book, of course; it was more for background noise than anything) and tall, blond, and handsome had to come stomping around in her kitchen of all places (why the kitchen?) and disturb her peace and quiet!

It wasn’t that unusual for Eric to stop by, though.

In fact, here lately he’d been dropping by oh-so-casually about every third night or so. 

Sometimes they had lively discussions where it seemed he delighted in getting her riled up over this or that, but a lot of times they’d just sit and watch whatever was on late-night tv or maybe pop in a movie.

To date he’d somehow managed to increase her old-movie collection by about quadruple.

She had to admit it was kind of nice, sometimes…ok, usually, and he always acted differently to how he’d act in that silly club of his.

But what was he doing here now and in her kitchen at that?

With a begrudging huff she marked her place in her book and started to unwrap herself from her cozy throw-cocoon but then stubbornly decided to wait it out.

If he wanted to talk to her, he could come find her.

It wasn’t like he didn’t have manpire senses at his disposal.

Then she heard the freezer door, two cabinet doors, and the refrigerator door open and shut.

Then – was that…what did he need with…?

Book forgotten, Sookie dislodged her wrappings as she slowly sat up, her concentration focused on the odd noises coming from her kitchen.

When she heard what had to be eggs being cracked – she’d lived with her gran far too long to not know what that sound meant – she couldn’t stand it anymore and had to investigate.

Barefoot, in baggy sweatpants and a half-tucked t-shirt, she padded to the kitchen door and…stared.

Eric, tall blond Viking vampire that he was, was standing at the counter glaring at egg goo as it dripped from his hand.

Apparently he’d missed the bowl that looked like it had flour in it.

A subsequent glance about the kitchen told her that no, it wasn’t flour.  On the table was an opened box of chocolate cake mix, three tubs of store-bought frosting, and a container of strawberries.

“Eric, what in the world are you doing?”

He looked up at her as she dashed to the kitchen sink and grabbed a paper towel and didn’t speak until she’d wiped the recalcitrant egg from his hand and the counter.

“Tonight starts Valentine’s Day,” he stated as though that clarified anything.

“Yeah, and?” 

She pulled him over to the sink and pointed at the tap for him to wash his hands, then tossed away the paper towel’d bundle of squished egg.

“I have to oversee the club tomorrow night as it will be packed.”

He didn’t seem pleased by this fact, and Sookie had to snort.  She knew exactly how some of Fangtasia’s Finest would dress and act.

To her surprise, he continued.

“Pam assures me this holiday is important especially to females who like to receive things that they like, so I have bought you a cake.  You like cake.” 

He nodded with purpose. 

“Now I have to make it.”  He glanced down at his now-clean hands. 

“Somehow.”

Once he was back at the bowl, however, he stared down at said egg…then at the eggs already in the bowl, then back to the egg in his hand.

Shaking her head and trying to control the huge grin demanding face-space, Sookie walked over and held her hand out.

While Sookie stood there with her jaw dropped, Eric sped back to the refrigerator and withdrew another egg.

“Here, gimme that.”

With unashamed relief, Eric gladly placed the dratted egg into her hand.

No more was said as she expertly cracked the egg and added the remaining ingredients until she handed Eric a wire whisk.

“Here, give this a good stir,” she instructed the bemused blond giant while she dragged out cake pans and set the oven to pre-heat.

She figured his vampire whisking skills would be better than hers for a lighter, fluffier cake.

He did as instructed and watched with clear curiosity as she buttered the cake pans and then put flour in them…only to knock it right back out. 

Humans, he thought for the billionth time, were weird.  Why did she put flour in pans then dump it out?  And what was with the butter? 

This cake-making proposition was becoming more unfathomable by the minute.

And it had all started out so simple, too.  Pam had remarked…remarkably casually for her… that human females liked receiving things on Valentine’s Day and that they liked receiving things that they actually liked.

Eric knew Sookie liked cake, and that she liked ice cream.  The ice cream – butter pecan because he recognized the scent – was easy enough to procure and he had even remembered to place it in the freezer part of her refrigerator when he’d first arrived.

It was the cake that was proving…untrustworthy.

Sure, he had inspected the baked and decorated cakes available in the market but they were all garish and weird, and they smelled like acrid chemicals.  When an elderly lady nearby had mentioned to her bedraggled cabbage-scented companion that cake mixes might be a better idea, he had silently followed them to that section of the store only to stare in dismay at the numerous offerings. 

How many types of chocolate cake mix did humans need?

With an eeny meeny miny moe, catch the Loki by the toe he’d grabbed the chocolatiest looking mix only to then be confounded by the concept and vast number of cake frostings in small containers.

To err on the side of caution, he’d selected three of the blasted things in different flavors – dark chocolate, cherry vanilla, and butter pecan – then fled to the fresh fruits section of the store. 

At least he recognized strawberries.

Sookie calling his name interrupted his musing.

“Eric, that’s enough.  That cake’s gonna be ten feet tall if you don’t stop.”

With a laugh she took the bowl from his hands, placed the whisk on a plate that had mysteriously appeared on the counter, and proceeded to divide the cake mix between two of the weirdly floured pans.

Once everything was in the oven baking, she grabbed the whisk and he thoroughly enjoyed watching her clean the lucky thing with her tongue.

“Stop starin’,” she said with a blush as she turned away and walked to the sink.

(The tiniest of wee giggles came from the top back corner of the kitchen.  The little spider had been watching since the Vampire had hurriedly stomped into the kitchen and then had the audacity to flip on the overhead lights. 

Once fully and reluctantly awakened – spidering was hard and it’s not like the tastiest fliers were nocturnal, damn it – he’d settled in to watch the cold-blooded invader be beaten by…an egg.

An egg.

And now the blond giant was pouting at a kitchen tool.

It was proving to be an entertaining night.)

“So, what’s with all the cake frosting?  And the strawberries?” 

Sookie hoped he didn’t notice what had to be a cheeky grin – of course she knew the date.  She had to give him credit, though, since he was definitely putting some effort into whatever it was he was doing.  But three tubs of frostings?  For one cake?

Eric shrugged. 

“I purchased three of them hoping you would like at least one.  And the strawberries… Well, you like them.  There is also ice cream in the freezer,” he added proudly.

“Ice cream?”

He could almost see her ears perking up at that.

Sookie darted over to the freezer and, sure enough, there sat butter pecan ice cream in all its delicious glory.

With a squeal and Eric-pleasing haste, Sookie was soon sitting at the table with a bowl, a spoon, an ice cream scoop, and the all-important ice cream.

Knowing that people should be praised when they did a good job, she grinned at the Viking sitting at her table trying not to look too smug. 

“Thank you, you did good!”

It wasn’t long before Eric was jealous of the spoon, too.

He sat quietly watching as she obviously enjoyed the treat, and pondered why it was important to him to do these things for her, to please her.

Sure, he easily acknowledged that he’d enjoyed her company more and more these past couple of months, and it hadn’t taken him long to realize he would rather visit with her at this old house than in the club he was enjoying less and less these nights.

A loud, malodorous all-you-can-drink buffet was handy and all, but at the end of the night he still had to shower off the smell as he did not want that miasma to follow him to bed.

Sookie’s house, though, smelled…pleasing.  Yes, there were odors of “old lady” and baking and wood and so forth, but Sookie’s sweet scent overrode it all.

His eyes flicked around the kitchen as Sookie bit into whatever a butter pecan was.  Perhaps it should be strange that he would be so oddly comfortable in the old farmhouse, but for whatever reason, he was.  It was quiet and clean, and certainly much more intimate than the club where he had to maintain a false front before minions and dinner.

He found the differences pleasing.

Eric gave a mental shrug; nothing about this had to make sense, did it?  Not really, no matter how often Pam would snicker at him as he left to visit “the little blonde fairy”.

His thoughts were interrupted when Sookie reached for the three cans of frosting.

“Why these three?”

Sookie thought Eric’s indignation was cute.

“Well, you made good choices.  This one,” she held up the butter pecan cake frosting, “will be good on another cake but these two will be perfect.  We can put some of the cherry vanilla between the layers and cover the whole thing in the dark chocolate.  That’ll work out great.”

“Do you know how many different types of cake coverings there are?  I barely narrowed it down to these!”

He quirked a brow.  “Some of the cherry vanilla?  What will you do with the rest?”

“Eat it on pancakes later,” she answered with a grin.

The ageless Viking nodded wisely.  He had no clue what she meant but she was smiling and that was good.

They chatted while Sookie put away the ice cream and washed the few dishes now dirtied.  Afterward she made herself some coffee and handed him a warmed blood beverage he tended to stock in her refrigerator.

Eventually the cake was baked and cooled and deemed ready to frost.

Absolutely out of his depth, Eric stared in confusion at the off-set knife-looking tool now in his hand.

“Here,” she said as she handed him the cherry vanilla frosting.  “Grab up a bunch of frosting with the spreader then smear it around there,” she pointed to the top of the bottom layer of cake.

He hadn’t minded leveling off the cake – using knives was in his blood warm and cold both, after all – but…well…smearing?

“I would rather smear this on you,” he replied faux-seriously with a smirk.

“Eric, hush.  Wait, hang on a sec, let me drizzle some of this Maraschino cherry juice on the cake first.”

He thought the red syrup smelled far too much of chemicals to be healthy but stood aside anyway.

Then, he slathered.  After leveling the top layer of this convoluted cake and allowing Sookie to repeat the drizzling to her pleasure, he found himself covering the entire cake with the dark chocolate frosting.

He decided he was, in fact, quite good at it. 

Naturally.

In short order and absolutely unwilling to wait, Sookie served herself a slice of the newly made cake and tossed a handful of hulled and rinsed strawberries on her plate.

The evening had felt pretty much like every other evening Eric had spent with her – fun, easy going, flirting both gentle and lurid, some teasing, lots of conversation about things that mattered and things that didn’t…but it was also a bit more, somehow.

Sure, there was unexpected cake.

The cake was delicious. 

But…it was a Valentine cake, one that she’d had to help make at that, but still, he’d thought of her and brought it to her and had even tried to at least start making it.

For her.

She looked over at Eric and, yes, he looked a bit smug at his obvious success, but he mostly looked comfortable, relaxed – he looked right at home.

A glance at the clock showed it was a little after 1:00 am and so, with a soft smile and warm eyes, she reached over and covered his hand with hers.

“Thank you for a great Valentine’s Day, Eric.  You did a great job and I loved it.”

Slowly a true, real smile graced his lips as he turned his hand to hold hers.

“I still want to smear the frosting on you.”

(The spider tsked and shoved his weary head – hey, spidering was hard work! – into the corner of the wall.  Great, the Viking had scored big with Ms. Landlady…great…wonderful…now if they’d just turn off that damn light and go watch a movie…in the other room already!)

All tsking spider-creatures aside, that’s it, folks. It’s meant to be a brief “scene” showing This Eric and This Sookie takin’ the slow route toward getting to actually know each other. I hope it didn’t suck too badly – my writing fingers are incredibly rusty, but I wanted to give you guys something for you time and support. I’m incredibly lucky for being able to write for the best fandom in the fanfic Universe.

In other news, well, there ain’t none, so there’s that. Excepting the above, FLM is still being her aggravating self but I am dearly hoping that “this” calls her sweet li’l ass back home ’cause it truly aggravates and frustrates me that I’ve left stories unfinished. I know – it’s not like I ever planned for my life to go swirling down the cosmic toilet and that *waves hand vaguely* things happen, but still. It’s not fair to you and it’s not fair to the stories, either. (My bad, totally, for having more than one going at a time instead of holding them until they’re completed BEFORE posting, but I’m not that organized…or sane…)

Anyway, I hope you liked it and feel free to comment below. Hope you have a great Valentine’s/Galentine’s/Palentine’s/Pawentine’s Day! 💗❤️💗

~Mer

Obligatory PayPal Link

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A tiny surprise + words

I’ve been feeling really badly about leaving you guys hanging for so long (I really hope your hands aren’t hurting!) so when I had a bit of a thought about apples, I ran with it in hopes it might help cheer you guys as well as my rather depressed muse. 

(The ridiculously huge bills flooding my mailbox, the fact I’m *still* on crutches, *still* in the 1,000-lb boot, *still* have to use the ‘chair to go to the dr – and that’s pretty much the only place I *can* go given the money sitch – combined with so many other small and massive issues = one depressed muse.  She’s starting to look pretty damn wilted at this point.)

Anyway, while the entirety of this drabble? (I never know what to call stories when their classification is based on length) is 1,005 words (not including my ubiquitous ANs – they’re, like, mandatory, right?), I like to think it’s setting Sookie up for a far better future. 

It’s my gift to you guys, and I hope you enjoy.

Let me know what you think, and I hope you have a fantastic Friday.

~Mer

Told-ja so: STC, Ch. 34, is up!

I hope you guys like!!  Assuming the universe is all kind and shit I’ll maybe actually even get a chance to (hopefully) reply to (hopefully) all your (hopefully) kind comments on this chapter (hopefully). 

Hopefully.

I hate when I can’t because you guys are great.

*sigh*

Enjoy!

Let me know what you think, and have a great one (the “one” being entirely up to you, natch…).

~Mer

S is TC again, y’all – Chapter 33 is up!

Here there be vampires!  And Fairies!  And Godric!  Who’s both!!
Heh, enjoy and let me know what you think.

(And just as a reminder, I’ve posted Chapters 39 and 40 of The Moon, too, in the past week or so, so there’s that, too.)

I didn’t spend many letters typing on and on about Eric and Godric growling and snarling in this chapter because, well, that kind of thing is understood, right?  It’s not that I forgot to describe it, right?  Nope, that’s not it at all.  Much.  Carry on…

~Mer

 

YUP, THAT, & a short TEASER

It’s been bizzy over here in Meridian-ville, which among other things is also good for those of you who enjoy my scribblings.  So…in this ‘issue’ we not only have the YUP and the “don’t forget THAT I posted these things that WP may not have informed you of” bit, but…there’s also a TEASER for the next Part of One Night.  And I am totally evil-grinning over here, too, cause I know what happens in this chock-full Part…

Continue reading

EN: ATS Chapter 18 is up!

I figured you guys would rather have a new chapter than me replying to your fantastic comments, although I do plan on getting to them regardless, but…yeah, chapters…!

Your support – from being excited to read the chapters to leaving such great reviews to all the other stuff in between – means the world to me and I really do appreciate it.  You guys are why I hit that “publish” button – I could write all day and all night without posting a thing, but y’all add the fun to the process.

Hope you enjoy – heh, Stan’s a hoot…

Eric Northman After the Show Main Banner Pic

And, just in case you’ve missed them, here are my last four fanfic posts since WP doesn’t always think to do its notification job:

STC, Ch. 28

STC, Ch. 27

STC, Ch. 26

Andre, Chapter 49

NOTICE AND *EXCERPT* OF UPCOMING STORY

Ok, so a while back I thought about posting a “thank you” story when the 500th person followed my blog (great choice, yo!).  Now, WP divides follow count into two sections:  blog and email, but for the purpose of this nefarious scheme of mine I’m counting actual blog follows since the total follower count would have risen far too quickly for me to have coughed up a decent story (it was well into the 600s total when this notion struck).

To that end, I’m currently 11,855 words into what will be a single-post long one-shot.  (Yes, there will be intermissions.)  This monster, The Night Eric Northman’s Life Changed Forever, begins just after Eric arrives home from Fangtasia the night he first sees Sookie and will encompass only that night (it’s a busy night).  As with anything I write, it goes AU at the speed of fangs snicking down and may include wee tiny tidbits from SVM.  This is written entirely in Eric’s POV with lots of thoughts and some snark.  Hey, it’s Eric, ya know?

Yes, there’s even a cat.

A little while ago my 501st follow just signed on board the WP express, so here’s a nice excerpt.  I won’t be posting the entire work until it’s completed but I expect it to be finished soon.

Without further ado, and to thank all my delicious followers (WP and email alike – y’all all smell fantastic, btw), here’s a little teaser that will MOST likely remain unchanged when the story is actually posted, but no promises:

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Once home from the bar, Eric Northman automatically headed straight to his shower. As financially pleasing as Fangtasia was, its accumulated stench was an entirely different story. Even when his “glaring from the throne” time was cut short, the reek of desperation mixed with too many chemicals still clung. Mechanically proceeding to soap up, scrub down, and rinse off, he let his thoughts wander through the night’s unusual events.

For the first time in…he couldn’t remember how long, the evening’s burdensome load of deadly, generic boredom had been shot all to hell.

Thank. Fuck. Even if it had included yet another raid for the crime of being vampire…

By this point he knew he would normally be fuming over the way money kept magically disappearing – for two cents he would suspect his accountant but the human had been glamoured to within an inch of his sanity so he highly doubted the man was capable of even stealing a pencil by now. That only left a scant handful of potential suspects and…his mental rant was interrupted by the memory of eyes that dared to directly meet and hold his own.

That was unusual in and of itself – that he thought of something different and that some young chit of a girl had dared to meet his gaze without flinching or fawning.

Vampires either feared him or were drawn to him, but either way they were innately wary of both his age and the power he naturally exuded. Same thing happened with Weres but with far less “lure” and far more “fear”, thanks be.

Humans were strange creatures. Most didn’t perhaps understand why they were both scared of and drawn to him, but they were and to an annoying degree.

Regardless, few dared to meet his gaze and actively hold it.

The girl didn’t seem to know much about vampires, though, which honestly should have made her even less likely to meet ones’ eyes since far too many of them knew about vampire glamour.

Damn publicity.

Among other things the way she’d held out her hand to Pam had proven a lack of intimate familiarity with his kind, but despite her nervous chatter she did seem to have a backbone when it came to those pictures.

Why was she going round shoving pictures of ugly women at vampires?   And why hadn’t fucking Compton filled her in on vampire etiquette, anyway? If she was supposedly “his” then that’s his fucking job. If you take on a human, you take on the job of educating them, damn it!

The fact she was on Compton’s arm said she was either stupid or naive, and Eric was pulling for the latter. Naive…he could work with naive.

As he toweled off, he caught himself almost grinning.

Compton actually thought he could keep such a tasty little drop of sunshine that intriguing all to himself? Moron must be more mentally decomposed than I’d originally thought.

What his disease of a Maker saw in him was the question of the ages.

But…what’s he doing in my territory anyway? Isn’t he supposed to be kissing someone’s ass in the darling queen’s court these nights? Something must be going on…he was trying too hard to be sly tonight…

For some reason that he didn’t bother searching for, he suddenly decided to shave off the scruffy beard he’d been sporting for a while. He glared at his hair as it fell into his eyes over and over again, but there wasn’t much he could do about it just then.

After donning his tracksuit bottoms and his silk robe, he padded into his office, grabbed one of his burner phones, and sent a text to his most dependable ear at the brat-queen’s court. If anyone could find out what was going on, it’d be Rasul.

He noticed a waiting text from Pam and checked it as he wandered into the den, then settled before his unlit fireplace. The option of having a warm flickering fire when he wanted it was nice but it wasn’t cool enough yet to warrant one – one of the many benefits of Shreveport, Louisiana.

***Bribed the bribeables and glam’d the humans, closed bar. Small fine, 2-night closure, blah blah blah. Taryn and her dinner weren’t caught but that bitch is going in a cage when I catch her. WTF was Blondie? Are there more where she came from? How did she know about the cops? I’m thirsty and I have her address – wanna split dinner?***

Eric felt something in his chest tighten at the thought of Pam biting the Stackhouse girl…

•~•0•~•

So…what’d you think:  Want more?   You know the drill – let me know what you think in the comments.  Have a great evening/night/morning, etc.!

~Mer

 

STC, Ch. 24, and other words:

1:  Here’s the new chapter of STC.  The Poll said you guys wanted a new chapter of this (what, you don’t like The Moon anymore??) (j/k…probably…) and since the muse (sometimes) listens,  voilà!!  Hope you like it!

STC banner from Gyllene

2:  Here are some recent posts jic WP neglected to send out the notifications:

EN: ATS, Chapter 17

Decisions, Chapter 35

BNP, Part 9 (the final chapter)

3:  The Fanatic Fanfics group are doing their nominations thing again so I’m hawking that – and not just for me, either:  there are some amazing writers and banner-makers in our fandom, so go show some love!  There’s a little less than a week left to toss names/links into the pot:

http://awards.fanaticfanfics.com/index.php/nominations

Now go read and I hope you enjoy!  *evil grin*

*tosses new BNP Part and hides*

Bribery and guilt trips don’t work.  Honestly.  They don’t.  Not at all.  Nope.  Never.  (*Innocent Look #29*) 

I feel like I should be writing more here but I think I’ve used up all my available words in fic chapters.  I need a refill…so here, go read then leave me lots of comments and reviews.  Maybe I can scrounge some words there.  (*gazes sadly into almost-empty coffee cup…damn thing has a hole in top and needs a refill, too*)

Hope you like it!

BNP huge

And yes, Eric and Sookie – face to face – next Part!  (Yay!!)

Well would you lookit that… EN: ATS Ch 15 is up!

No words of wisdom, really, just that whole “do unto others” and “don’t put your elbows on the table” (what, they’re gonna steal the silver?) thing…

So here’s EN: ATS Ch. 15, and the end of this chapter holds a bit of father/daughter, well, Maker/child sweetness…someone might have cut a bit of an onion around me right then, dammit.  Need to look into that shit…meanwhile I’m going to blame Christmas commercials!

Well, here…enjoy!

 

 

STC, Ch. 22 is up!

I’m going to go operate on a painful hangnail now.  Yes, I suffered the agonies of a VERY SORE HANGNAIL to get this chapter out to you ’cause that’s how I roll or, um, something.  Lol, enjoy!

STC banner from Gyllene SMALLER

So Sookie stopped by to chat this morning – Decisions, Ch. 33 (yes, Decisions) (yes, Sookie)

So yeah, Sookie from Decisions (yes, DECISIONS) stopped by this morning and was all chatty – downright verbose for her usual self!  I’m not an idiot (usually) so hell yeah I took advantage of this situation.  (Eric might have chimed in a bit, too!)   I’m only now on my *SECOND* cup of coffee and this chapter is done and everything!  For SOME vague, strange, dunno-why-I-think-it reason I had the notion that you Eric/Sookie shippers might enjoy this rare other-character treat, so here:

Decisions Story Banner

Enjoy!

Happy Tuesday? EN: ATS Ch 14 is up!

Thank you for your recent consideration as I dealt with the unexpected (although it really shouldn’t have been, but hell, how do you go about “expecting” someone to die?) death of my uncle. 

That event upset my muse a little and impacted, however temporarily, her (and my “her” I mean “my”) ability to focus on chapters for current WIPs.  Part of the reason for the temp. stop was that it caused her to think in a bit of a different way, I guess you could say, in a “mood” that would not have suited any chapter of any current fic I have open.  But…that different “mood”, because it IS so different, sideways-sparked a short new (as yet untitled) story that I’ve almost completed. 

Yes.

It will be *COMPLETED* (I really wanted to put some pretty fireworks and happy ‘splody things here) before I even post the first chapter.  A story that’s finished BEFORE posting the first chapter???  I’ve heard this can be done, that some writers even do this kind of common-sensical, intelligent thing on the regular!  Oh, I so admire their fortitude and, yeah, their common sense…  😀

Anyway, shit happens, the sun still rises, and life progresses.  Sometimes words are even (somehow…eventually) caused to magically appear on virtual paper.  Hence, EN: ATS Ch. 14!

Enjoy!

Eric Northman After the Show Main Banner Pic

Happy Friday! Andre, Ch. 46 (NSFW) **and** STC, Ch. 21 are up!

Because I adore you and want you to be happy, here’s a 2-fer.

To your left you’ll see a fine new, rather long and…erm, yeah, chapter of Andre.  Bloodlust is a thing, y’all:

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And to your right you’ll find a brand new chapter of STC where Sookie…then Eric…and…oh, hell, just read it:

STC banner from Gyllene SMALLER

Here’s hoping you have an awesome Friday, a fantastic Halloween, and an amazing weekend!

Hope this makes your Monday a bit less…Monday – Moon, Ch. 28, is up

Here’s to having the best Monday possible.  And by “best” I mean I hope you can just turn over and go back to sleep for a couple of hours, but if you can’t, I hope this helps.

aThe Moon banner 2

(No words of wisdom, just an offer of an extra coffee or tea or other murder-preventing beverage of your choice.)

Moon, Ch. 27, is up! (AKA: can I come out of hiding now?)

You heard it here ladies and gennelmen – The Moon, Ch. 27, is up!  (Srsly, you can stop with the de-coffee’ing threats now – not the bribes, though…they’re fine…) Hopefully this will help soften the “tomorrow’s Monday” blow.

Enjoy, and be sure to let me know what you think:

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The Moon, Ch. 26, is up! (Yes!)

First I want to apologize for not replying (yet, gotta see how my time goes) to your lovely, delicious, fantastic comments left on the last chapter of Moon.  I adore your comments – I really do, and the ones from last chapter have been a joy to read.  It’s fascinating how a single chapter (or even portion of a chapter) can be interpreted in so many different ways and how each angle is usually right in its own way.   (Sometimes there IS no right answer; other times ALL the answers are right.)

Free time, however, isn’t something I have a lot of and so I chose to go ahead and get this chapter out to y’all (while Eric was still willing to chat and everything…always good, that).  Plus it appears my area is possibly in for a visit from a hurricane potentially in the next few days maybe.  Every 10 minutes the forecast is something different, so who the fuck knows. 

Either way, here’s Ch. 26 of The Moon.  I hope you enjoy it and don’t murder me too  hard.  That’s a great way to get no more chapters…plus I’d be all crying and I don’t cry pretty…

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It’s another TWO-FER: ANDRE and THE MOON!

Cause I love y’all and stuff.  How do ya like me now??  *blows invisible dust off nails then sips coffee with graceful élan cause I can*

Ha! 

Ok, first up is Andre (cause he finally got off his pouty if really cute ass and started with the talking again):

Oh My Andre

And now…srsly, cause I adore y’all:

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Lemme know what you think!  😀

The Moon, Ch. 23, is up!

Sorry it’s been a little while (and also sorries for the lack of Andre update in the rotation, too, but he’s still being a bit of a bastard atm). 

I do my best (read: easiest) writing between midnight and, say, 5 am, which would be fine but the (ugh) outside world has this odd idea that people need to be ACTIVE and AWAKE and FUNCTIONING during those annoying daylight hours, and there are times when even *I* have to pretend to be a normally functioning human.  Yeah, it sucks. And it bites into my preferred writing time.  Which also sucks.

Ugh, real life can be real annoying.  What’s up with that, anyway??

But yeah, here!  Enjoy!

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WordPress is being strange (aka: WTF?)

Updated:

—> Since WordPress has decided to fuck with the ability to leave comments/reviews (the comment box comes and goes, and hell, WP is even having problems ensuring that post notification emails make it out…*eyeroll*), please feel free to visit my loathed fanfiction.asshole site, my AO3 site, or my TWCS site for this and all fics until they can figure out how to get their collective heads out of their collective asses.  Comment away!  WE WILL NOT LET THEM WIN!! **glare***   <—


So not only did WP magically and mysteriously “disenable” my Comment boxes (fixed now) on today’s new chapter, but I’m finding out that apparently it didn’t even send out some email alerts when I posted it, either.

That makes me wanna kick inanimate objects…you know, ones named “WordPress”.  I have really strong thighs…I can kick pretty damn hard…

Andre might not be my most popular story (understandable since it IS about Andre…yes, that Andre) but I put just as much time and effort into it as I do my higher-profile fics and it makes me angry that my readers who HAVE given it a chance might miss a new chappie b/c of WP’s fuckery.

Fucking meanypants.

Here’s the link for the new chapter (again) in case WP snubbed you:

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So this is it… Lol, Act 3 of the Andre crack fic is up and that POS is now complete!

Several of you fantastic fuckers have been going through some rough times here lately, and this silly crack fic was meant to bring you a few giggle-snorts, maybe a full-on belly laugh (ok, so I really wanted at least some of y’all to pee your pants laughing, but it’s ok if you didn’t…I won’t pout…much…*dabs eye with tissue*). 

I love thinking that I’ve brought a bit of sunshine, or at least some fun snark, to your life to brighten your day.  Life can suck donkey ass at times and if I can use my words to bring fun and joy to my fuckawesome readers, then that’s what Imma gon’ do.

So here.  This is the third and final “Act” in this mess.   It’s:

Done.

Finished.

Over and…out.

Clicky the pikky and read and giggle and then tell me I’m pretty (snark) — Just don’t tell Andre I wrote this…(not snark) :

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EN: ATS Ch. 11 is up!

Yes, the FLM (“flighty li’l muse”) might have spawned a 3-Act Parody of Andre (just do NOT tell him about it…) – it’s pure unmitigated fluffly nonsense and the third “act” will be posted either this evening or tomorrow – but: I’ve also been working on “the regulars”. 

It’s EN: ATS’s turn, so…HERE!  CATCH!  This chapter is all E/S…  Let me know in the comments if you liked it!  😀

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The Revealing of Andre, Chapter 43, is up!

1.  Thank you everyone for your well-wishes and support during the “The Great and Annoying Revenge of the Hands, V. 2015“.  The Site of the Great and Invisible Splinter is now all-but undetectable, and the Stabby-Sore Finger-Joint of Death and Grumbling seems to have finally shut-it.  The Voldemorting Palm Scar seems to be minding its manners, too, so yeah, that’s good.

I wisely and/or lazily gave all of the above a couple days’ extra rest before hovering too closely over my keyboard just in case.  You know how vengeful hands can be.  I wouldn’t want them attacking me in my sleep and I know those bitches…they totally would, too.

2.  For some reason WordPress has become a wise-ass here recently and has decided that aprox. one-fourth of the reviews and comments I receive need, for some reason, to go hide out in either the Pending or the SPAM folder instead of posting normally.  I’ve caught quite a few reviews and other comments from long-time readers as well as from some of my newer lovelies hanging out and being bored in those folders.  I’ll go through and approve (again and again and again), but for some reason it keeps happening.  I’m only letting y’all know about WP’s strange new habit so you won’t wonder where’n hell your review went when it doesn’t show up immediately, but no worries – I keep an eye on those folders. 

Also, I’ve been told by a couple of friends that, apparently depending on their phone’s system?, they sometimes have to enter their comments two or three times to get them to go through.  I dunno if this is a phone thing, a WP thing, or a duck farting in China thing, but it sounds very frustrating.  The comments do come through eventually, though, if you keep entering them.  I guess you have to keep stabbing “enter” or whatever till that duck farts or something.

KEEP REVIEWING, though – review OFTEN and LOTS and all that jazz CAUSE IT MAKES ME HAPPY!  😀  I like being happy!  Happy is good!

Okee dokee, after all that ado’ing, voilà:

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Enjoy!