GENERIC UPDATE – SKIP UNLESS BORED

This interruption in your daily (nightly?  hey, it’s possible) life is just to confirm that yes, I do indeed yet live.   Sort of. 

While I’m no longer reeling so badly from the death in my family, as a member of the “chronic bronchitis” club, apparently the time has come once again for me to, erm, (try to) cough up my membership dues. 

Hacking season is upon me.

This year’s dues have hit pretty hard (I reckon emotional devastation will do that to a body) and honestly, typing and concentration are both kind of hard to accomplish when you’re trying to see what the inside of your spleen looks like. 

I’d say I’m barkin’ like a seal but I don’t wanna trigger TOO many SSSSS flash-backs.  Ok, I totally do…I admit it…that’s why there’s brain bleach as the final chapter, yo.

In the meantime feel free to browse/re-browse? my collection of one-shots, parodies (proceed with caution with a couple of them…just ask veteran readers), and completed fics.  As with any fanfic writer, reviews/re-reviews? are always appreciated (especially when the words are all nice and sweet!), so go for it if you’re so inclined.

Hope you have a great rest-of-your-week…Imma go dope myself up again. 

Nyquil, Vicks, ginger/thyme tea, ginger/green tea, Gypsy Cold Care teas (gaaagh…so far the only tasty one is the chamomile but the Throat Coat – horrible violation of licorice’s more pleasant personal properties, y’all – seemed to [vaguely] help my voice [somewhat] try to make another [brief] appearance), hot beef and chicken soups and broths (not mixed; that’s just gross), hot lemon toddies (ok, just one cause ew), and various and assorted remedies have been attempted.

Ok, ok, the Nyquil is actually DAYquil and in tablet form at that – I’m sidelined, y’all,  and it’s not nice to torture the sick with *THAT* horrid taste.

Fwiw, I’d be on preddy, better inhalers, and the good chewy cough syrup but my doctor has turned into a fuckwitted jackass and I don’t feel like trying to break another one in just now.   I have limited patience at the very, very best of times.  This is not one of those times.  Also, I hate going to the doctor – I’m positive they have you wait in the communal sickroom hoping you’ll contract something else so you’ll have to come back after it incubates in a vicious never-ending cycle.

So…yeah, that’s where I’m currently at: coughing/hacking/seal-barking limbo.  Take your vitamins and get plenty of sleep and don’t be around sick assholes who gleefully and oh-so-generously donate their germs to you like you’re some sort of science project.  That’s what the back of the fridge is for. 

Yeah, a “slight cold” is what started all this bullshit.

(cough)

~Mer

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More TwiFuckery Parody Crack-Fic anyone? Huh?

Again, seriously:  READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. 

Also, if you’re of a thin-skinned or easily offended, hurt, butt-hurt, or pissed off nature, you might want to skip this “story”. 

Ok, I just hurt something laughing at the idea of this collection of “chapters” being considered anything NEAR a story…  It’s a load of pure crack/parody crap – I’ll totally and absolutely admit that.  And I’ll also totally own the fact that this mess is absolutely meant to mock, poke fun at, and draw attention to some of the more absurd “plots” and themes running rabidly rampant through out several fandoms – but never the writers themselves.

Let us be clear on this:  I am not mocking, et al., the writers – just some of the crap that escapes their brains via their keyboards.

Enjoy, have a laugh, commiserate, add your own peeves in the comments, or ignore the hell out of it – totally up to you, my friends. 

R Putz1 3

Just a few of my *observations regarding sex scenes in the fanfic world…

Here’s a teeny, tiny, itsy-bitsy literary eye-roll I have about some of the “OMGodric – Srsly?” terms, phrases and actions used in fanfic sex scenes.  Don’t get me wrong:  the whole point behind writing fanfic is to FIRST AND FOREMOST enjoy creating a story based on the books or tv show that you love.   But…geez…Godric…:

•0~*~*~*~*~*~•0•~*~*~*~*~*~0•

*Apparently female pussies/sexes/love boxes/cunts (a word I DESPISE!)/muffs/vaginas (it’s VULVA, people…vaginas are on the INSIDE!  *sigh*  Here:

The vulva (from the Latin vulva, plural vulvae, see etymology) consists of the external genital organs of the female mammal.[1] This NSFW article deals with the vulva of the human being, although the structures are similar for other mammals.

Told’ja.) of all species are always permanently gushing  and/or dripping, and, according to male responses, apparently have a strong odor problem.  Perhaps a doctor should be seen for both situations?  Does all that gushing/dripping  pool at their feet?  Won’t they get a fungus from all that perma-moisture?

* Apparently these females are pretty much in perma-heat…but only after meeting the male (or female?) that fate/the fates/nature/some prophesy or other/whatever has chosen for them.  Also apparently, free choice is – at best – barely an option.  But that’s also apparently ok since her pussy/vulva/love box/gushing cavern craves what’s-his-name so much that she’ll “choose” him anyfuckingway. 

*When going down on said male-of-their-dreams, apparently the female is supposed to “swallow all that he has to offer”…  Does that include his wallet?  What about cars?  Jewelry?  Wouldn’t those be hard to swallow?  Is that supposed to sound better than “thick ropes of cold vamp cum slithering down her throat” or something?

confused

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